Spoiler: It usually starts with doing everything wrong

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Don’t say I didn’t warn you

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Humans are in a terrible catch 22:

A fulfilling life includes two contradictory aspects. Healthy people get aroused and sexually attracted to many people every day AND healthy people also resist that urge and remain loyal to whom they love.

Said plainly, we want to make love to a lot of people but we really shouldn’t…or can’t.

Thankfully, people like me are terrified of rejection, are self-conscious, look like a cross between George Clooney and Kermit the Frog, and possess a neurosis so pervasive by the time sex is even possible, the woman has either jumped off a bridge or…

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Humans aren’t meant to be digitized

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The bursting of the illusions of ourselves

You don’t have to be a neuroscientist to know our brains have changed these past couple of decades.

Or is a mind-numbing necessity

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Laziness or something deeper

I often hear young folks have no work ethic and aren’t willing to pay their dues.

Biological disposition

On an evolutionary scale, it’s only a minuscule amount of time that we humans were doing anything other than running around enjoying the lakes and rivers, eating wild berries, and enjoying the freedom of living.

You can be both attached and free.

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The freedom of singlehood

Being single means doing whatever you want.

I’m free

Some people have a boyfriend…

But if you ever want to love again, you’ll keep it to yourself.

An interrupted explosion or a thud

I will always love all three of…

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Internal struggle

One of the advantages of being single is not caring too much about editing my thoughts. After all, there is nobody to say, “I was THIS close to jumping your bones, but you say so much stupid shit, there’s no way.”

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Here’s a couple of my more outlandish ideas:

Geriatric Escort Service: I’m not using any euphemisms here. This is an old guy or gal having sex for money. If you’re a man and made it to 80 or above, there are more single octagenarian women than you can shake a wooden stick at.

The unspoken fear and hope

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We all know it’s going to happen someday, but the idea of dying from a once in a hundred-year virus is disarming.

Jonathan Morris Schwartz

Jonathan Morris Schwartz is a speech language pathologist living in Ocala, Florida with his daughter Rachel and a dog named Bruno.

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