Why Women Don’t Chase Nice Guys

Because they don’t have to

Photo by Craig Sybert on Unsplash

I don’t mean to insinuate all men fit neatly into one of two categories — nice or evil. I fall into the mushy middle. A man who wants to be good but sometimes falls short.

We’re attracted to conflict and drama

When was the last time you saw a movie about a perfect marriage? You know the movie where the man and woman do everything right — they’re kind to each other, listen to each other’s needs, are fiercely loyal, and have earth-shattering sex.

There is no such movie. Why?

Because if we want to be entertained, we seek drama and conflict.

If you get two texts, and one says, “Hey, my wonderful husband just surprised me with flowers and candy. Isn’t he sweet?” or “Girl, you’re not going to believe what I caught my husband doing.” Who are you going to call first?

Here are some more concrete examples:

Truthful about intentions

If you thought you loved her — or him — but realize you just wanted casual sex. And you want to see other people, the nice guy says:

“I am immensely attracted and excited by you, but I don’t want to be misleading. I’m not ready for a relationship. Therefore, even though I could…